25-10 - Flipbook - Page 113
October 2025
them. When you start seeing them in this skewed way, it affects many areas of your marriage. You9re less empathetic and more likely to assume
negative intent, which in turn impacts how they see and respond to you
as well. It creates a reciprocal effect that can spiral your dynamic quickly.
The truth is, while there are times you9ll spontaneously feel you9ve
outkicked your coverage, other times you can make a conscious choice
to see your spouse in this light. You don9t need to see them as perfect or
have a completely unrealistic view of who they are. It9s not about feeling
down on yourself or that you don9t measure up to them in some way. Instead, it9s about letting all of their positive qualities color the way you see
them first, instead of the other way around. It9s leaning into this perspective not only in your interactions with them but also in the way you present
your marriage to the rest of the world. Here are some examples of how
you can both show you9ve outkicked your coverage:
Supporting each other9s endeavors and achievements Instead of downplaying your spouse9s ambitions, you9re their biggest cheerleader. You
support them in going after their goals and are there to lift them up when
they9re struggling.
Speaking highly about each otherInstead of complaining about them to
anyone who9ll listen, you low-key brag about them (genuinely). Whether
your spouse is in the room with you or not, you talk them up the same either way.
Always striving to learn moreInstead of assuming you know everything
about them, you are always curious to learn more. You ask them thoughtful questions and are interested in their thoughts, opinions, and what
makes them tick.
Truly listeningInstead of only partially listening or thinking about your own
response, you listen with your head and your heart to better understand
your spouse perspective. You work on keeping defensiveness down, and
this pays dividends.
Avoiding complacency in your marriageInstead of assuming things are
