25-08 - Flipbook - Page 101
August 2025
8Do two walk together unless they have agreed to do so?9
Amos 3:3 NIV
Relationships are built on mutual trust 3 and trust is based on speaking the truth. But there are ways of speaking the truth that help and
ways that hurt. The 8give-them-a-piece-of-my-mind9 approach just
drives the wedge deeper. Then there is the Bible way: 8Speaking the
truth in love, we will grow9 (Ephesians 4:15 NIV).
Let9s suppose a couple fights because he is habitually late. How
can she make sure her message gets across? Well, she could say to
him:
a) 8I feel frustrated.9 No blame, no attack; just an honest sharing of
how she feels.
b) 8When you are late…9 No judging, name-calling, or labelling; just
a description of how she sees his action.
c) 8It seems to say to me that my time isn9t really important to you.9
No moralising; just honestly sharing her emotions.
d) 8In the future, can you please try to be on time or call me and let
me know when you will be here?9 Instead of focusing on past actions he can9t change, she is telling him what she would like him to
do differently next time.
e) 8Would you be willing to do that for me?9 No demanding or taking for granted; just asking for consideration and cooperation.
And when he agrees, they have an implied 8contract9. She thanks
him sincerely and rewards every effort he makes to keep his word.
In effect, she has just realigned the relationship by making him an
ally instead of an adversary. She has also redefined the focus as a
shared one, not something she 8does to him9! Like the Bible says, we
can 8walk together9 when we have 8agreed to do so9.
